How to Stop Avoiding Choice

We avoid choice to avoid discomfort!  

If as a child you forgot your lines in the school play or were picked last and were designated to be a tree then you may avoid being the centre of attention publicly for life!

If math was taught to you in a way that you didn’t understand or enjoy you may avoid reconciling your bank statements or working out your currency exchange and just accept what you are given.

If your grandfather shouted at you when you were a child and at the same time put you down (that creates a ‘trauma’ in your world) you may avoid certain people your whole life and never allow yourself to be aware that you choose that.

Same goes for how you be with money. And most of the time people don’t even know where that discomfort comes from. It comes from the pool of crazy around about you! And we also pick it up through osmosis.

Many of us have had ‘big traumas’ and 1000’s of ‘little traumas our whole lives that we give power to.

Most people make choices many times a day (not cognitively) to avoid discomfort. 


I recently had so much ‘pain’ (pain is subjective) to deal with, that it eclipsed all of the ‘pain’ I was avoiding.  It has been a eureka after eureka period for me.  

So if my future self could hold the hand of my past self I would say to her, ‘Just take a step in the direction you are avoiding – see how brave you can be.  See if you die.

If you would like to truly live, you have to be willing to embrace your discomforts. I promise you wont die – unless you are choosing that.

Each choice we make opens the door to more awareness of more possibilities and more choices. 

Ask the question: what would it take to enjoy exploring this?

Moira Bramley